Saturday, June 27, 2009
So...today is the first day of my vacation. Nine wonderful days with only my family in my house. I love my preschoolers...but I have not had a vacation in a very long time. Everyone kept asking where we were going...uhmmmmm nowhere. Honestly we can't afford to go anywhere and I just really wanted to do alot of not too much. So...when I woke up at 5am this morning my head was spinning with stuff and I was very annoyed???!!! I found this upsetting and confusing as it was my first day of vacation and I should be relaxed and happy. So...what the heck?? I got my coffee and sat down to read every one's posts this morning..I can do this today..with no rush. Several posts were about the stress of everyday life, things moving too fast, not enough fun time, etc. A light bulb turned on...I woke this morning and started making a mental list of all the things I had to do before my week was done...am thinkin' this was the sneaky culprit who was pissing me off. Just snuck right in there and took over my vacation.
I know this sneaky guy..the even though you are on vacation..I have a list of things you really should do...if you don't guilt will set in and things will be left undone. Who is gonna do them if I do not, what is going to happen if I.....blah, blah, blah. Yup, do you know him? I deal with this little guy daily, pressure of work, home, my artwork, do the bills, stock the fridge, read to the kiddos, plan projects, plan fun -yikes that should have been a sign right there - plan fun!!!??? Sometimes we all just get wrapped up in the 10K of daily life. Sometimes I get totally burned out & for what ever reason, saying I need a day, or a week, or a month to do...not to much, doesn't happen. But why?? Guilt, assumed responsibility- yes I said assumed, five hundred excuses why we don't stop and breathe. Yup...my slave driver was pushing me to fill my delicious nine days with things to do. I was pissed off because I could see my week quickly turning into a nonstop marathon of stuff to do!! Alot of it good stuff, but most of it stuff that I can do another week..like the week after my vacation.
So...the key here was, what do I really want to do and what do I need to do. Trying to reverse the want/need thing is a toughie but I think I can do it!! I need to go to my U of I appointment & my appointment for a physical, because I can only do that during the week. I need to clean a bit daily, because it will keep me sane. Honestly...that's really all I need to do. I know some of you will say screw the cleaning..but too much chaos makes Sarah a cranky girl. But I will delegate a large portion of it to my rather large household. So....I feel better, thank you for helping me chase off that pesky little guy!! I feel lighter already! I hope you all have a wonderful Saturday. I'm thinking I will...maybe...do not too much and a nap. What do ya think?? Namaste, Sarah