Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Jamie has asked us today - What help do you wish to receive? I read this last night - being on the West coast I saw it at 9pm. I couldn't answer it then - to raw still I guess. So I will suck it up and say - help understanding my daughter's actions and clearer understanding of how/if I have contributed to this somehow. Help to not feel so deeply hurt myself. Friends who know what we have been through with Hanna since she came to live here all the time have asked me, "Do you feel relieved Sarah?" You would think I would as she has created huge stress here. My head knows she is getting the help she needs to be a functional human!!! I'm saddened that I could not give that to her - and not clear on why she could not accept that help from me. I guess my heart has not let go yet. Nor should it I suppose. So help with healing for all of us please!!!