Sunday, December 13, 2009

Quilting Bee #35's cold outside..really cold outside! We are expecting snow today...whoo hoo!! So very glad you are here today! I have the cabin all warmed up and the fire is crackling!! Hand warmers are in the basket by the fire..go warm up and cozy! More hot cocoa, Kona coffee and tea are ready to pour. I have skillet breakfasts ready to go today. Add what every you would like...potatoes, eggs, ham, bacon, sausage, onions, mushrooms, spinach, name it we have it..of course sour cream and cheeses to top it off. A good hearty holiday breakfast this morning. I have racked a quilt full of twist and turns and surprises today. Please pull up a chair and join me!!

I feel like I have been in a fog for a month or so..kind of like writers block..sort of. What I wanted to share with you just seemed blocked behind all of the stuff in my life. I felt my Quilting Bee's were repeating themselves..dull..without the spark I wanted to offer you. So I sat down with my muse and asked her....what's I done with the Bees..have I offered up all I have there?? She laughed at me, she did!! After a long chat here by the fire...she told me this....

" are spread too thin, it's time for you to shed a bit."

Oh....I knew right away what she meant..I did..I have been fighting it. Fighting it hard. Change..I have to change...ackkkk. Regroup and refigure my time and what I can reasonably fit into it. I have packed my life with so many amazing activities this year. Truly it shocked me as I filter through the last year. How many wonderful people have blessed my life! I have to shed some of that??? I know I do I know? That scattered, frustrated feeling..and guilt. Guilt that I am not taking care of the folks that have blessed me as I run about like a chicken with my head cut off. My muse is right ...I need to shed and regroup.

When I started selling my artwork online a year and a half or so was all on Ebay. I was invited to join several groups there..I love the groups on Ebay. I love the folks there..I do. To be frank the economy has hit Ebay hard. That an the fact that Ebay has added several new rules and changes that make it hard for the little guy there. I know many artists are doing well there still. I for one have not had a good year on Ebay. Dismal really. What I have sold have been eaten up by higher fees. So slowly but surely..I kinda just stopped selling there. To be honest I don't think it was an active just happened. Talk about not being self aware.

I did decide this summer to focus more time on Etsy. This Fall Sherry Byrum (whom I adore) and I decided to start a Team there. What a pure joy that has been. This included a blog and a Ning networking site. Work and time yes..but wow what an amazing group of artists!! Many of them are friends from Ebay!! I adore that. We have over 80 members!!! Wow. To do the Team right I need to be there and on top of things more. Guilt.

I think of anything I have done online that has fed my heart and soul it is here. I have been touched, befriended, loved on, praised, offered shoulders and advice, blessed, healed, inspired, encouraged and given a pair of swan wings that I just love. Thank you Renee! And my sisters..are blogging too..who could have known!? Whoo hoo! I love these Bees I do. The blessing for me..that you actually respond to what I write. Me writing.. weekly..who would have guessed a year ago?? Certainly not me!!

My artwork has taken on a life of it's own..telling me what is coming next..what styles to use. Clearly my pens have taken over there!! I love this too..I do! The photography...OMG I cannot tell you what huge joy that has brought to my life!!

So..what's wrong you ask? I have to do as my muse directs..because she is right. In all this wonder, I have become fragmented to the point that I can no longer focus on the path..I keep wandering off of it..daily. That path to my True North. As I wander..everything suffers. Nothing is getting done as I want it my expectations. Being the creative, organized person I am..this has made me blue, teary and cranky! My family need me to be more when it is their turn for me..I am present with them!

This month I have been a scattered wreck. My Muse is is time to shed a bit, painful as it is. I am letting go of a few groups groups I am in, to focus on the Etsy Team and my art sales there. I will step away from things in my life that no longer feed and nurture me. Sometimes for some of us, that includes people too. I will be focusing on my blogs and those that I mod here. Focusing on the folks who have made my first year here a joy and a blessing. Most definitely the artwork and photography. I feel lighter already..I do. I feel my true voice coming back to me.

Sometimes in the course of a year we gather things to us. Wonderful beautiful things, horrid, painful things. What we forget to do is stop along the way and take them out of our pack and set them aside and move on without them. We become burdened down with the weight of things we do not need. My goal this next year is simple. Stop now and again and chat with my she can remind me to breathe, regroup and shed. Sometimes to remain on your true path you have to say no and let go.

So this morning I would love for you to share with me what you need to shed this December? Before the new year flys in. What do you want to keep? What is your Muse, your Soul, you Spirit asking of you? Let Fly!

OK...I think I will have a veggie skillet with some delicious Kona Coffee. Thank you for joining me today..what a blessing you have been to me this year. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!!
Namaste, Sarah

Post Script...
You may have noticed that I have posted a piece of my artwork today instead of a quilt. Over the last ten months I have tried to feature beautiful quilts and link it to their blogs or websites. I have received several not so happy emails from folks upset that I have featured their quilt without permission. I understand this on one hand..I do. On the other I guess I felt like I was sending folks their way. Which was good..I thought. Anyway..I have come to the decision..that it is happening too often..angry quilters. So I will just say..if you have an quilt pic. or an artwork pic.created by you, that you would like to have featured and linked to your blog or website..please send it my way with your link...:)


jaz@octoberfarm said...

hi sarah...i just posted a new giveaway if you want to enter hop on over!

Debra She Who Seeks said...

It's so unfair that there are only 24 hours in a day, LOL! But you're right, we must be selective in the use of our time. Sometimes brutally selective. No one can do it all! Blessings to you, Sarah!

Sherry Byrum said...

Oh how I can relate Sarah!! I too have had to reorganize and give a lot of thought to how I spend my time. Time is precious. I've met so many wonderful people on MySpace, Facebook, on here, the art groups, the Black Hat and I love meeting people but there is only so much time. I too have had to drop a couple of groups. Ebay has been a huge disappointment to me this year. I've been selling on Ebay since 1999 and this is definitely the worse year we've had as far as sales go. Some people have become so special to me they are like family, including you, and I will always make time for them because they encouraged me through some rough spots and have given so much of their selves to me. I have found myself spending so much time online my painting has been neglected which is what started the whole thing to begin with. So I think it is good, we take a look back at the last year and regroup and organize our time. Don't give up on your art, the economy will change. Do what makes Sarah happy!! lots of hugs!

Snap said...

I think we all relate to not enough time ... there should be at least 8 days a week, with each day at least 30 hours long! (I bet that wouldn't help.) For the next coming months, my sole role will be to help Mr. Dragon get well ... to manage his cancer treatment ... to live fully with faith and hope. To care for myself so that I can care for him. To love, laugh, live and conquer!


clairedulalune said...

My dear Sarah, your muse is one smart lady! As i was reading your post, a wave of frantic panic came over me as i thought you were not going to blog anymore! Nearly fainted! Honey, you do what you got to do, and I know you will do it, you are amazing!! It is hard, we want to make the best out of life, and enjoy it too, but as your muse said, you can spread yourself too thin! Don't we all at times? I wish i was beside you so i could give you a big hug, as i have read your blog for about a year now, and you surprise and awe me everytime and I have loved watching your spirit grow. Such a inspirational lady you are! Lets spread those wings and fly! BTW: angry emails from quilters? Just you forward them emails on to me! Hehe! ((squishy hugs!!)

TechnoBabe said...

Good for you! Take the steps to let go of some things so you can enjoy the rest of your life more.

Bonnie, Original Art Studio said...

Oh Sarah, you are such a wise lady - and with so many talents and responsibilities and friends....clearly spread too thin. I would miss you if you never commented on my blog (a lot!), however, I would rather know that you are putting your health, your family, and your artistic talents first.

It's all about keeping our faith with our fundamental priorities. You are so talented that beyond primary duties to self and family you have a 'duty' I think to make sure you develop your artistic endeavors - a gift to the world and your family.

You are so lovable. But all of us who love you could, without wanting your knowing, gobble you up. Protect yourself and your talent.

Love, Bonnie XO

Bonnie, Original Art Studio said...

meant to type "without wanting OR knowing, gobble you up". :)

Sharon said...

Hi Sarah, I am so with you and your post. Ihave made some choices as of late that are helping. I have learned to say no and not feel quilty. I am more in tune with life and family. Ihad been trying to help a friend and she really took advantage of me to the point my health was taking a toll. So I made the decision that this friendship had turned toxic and I quietly ended it. It was hard but it was for the best. I now have more time for my art and I am so enjoying life. Have a happy holiday Sarah. Warmly Sharon

cinner said...

Sarah, you just take care of you and don't spread yourself too thin. I have to be more organized next year as I feel I have wasted some of my days. So I am planning on scheduling myself better just with everyday things. I wish you all the best my friend. Also toxic anythings are out of my life, that has to be for my sanity, says a crazy Canadian. lol. big hugs.

Suzie said...

Sarah, once again you voice the same concerns that I'm having to deal with too. But the few things that would be easiest to give up, are ones that I'm also wanting to, and need to embrace for myself.
As you may remember, my Hubs has cancer and has been living with it for a number of years now. As time has passed, he is less able to do things around here, with it falling on my shoulders.

At the same time, my Mom, who is in her mid 80's, has had increasing health issues, and is now starting to show signs of Alzheimer's. I'm an only child, and my step-Dad died 10 years ago, so her care is up to me. She currently refuses to move in with us, or into a continuous care facility. I do her shopping, and take her to her appointments.

Then, this past Summer, my Hubs was diagnosed with Lewy Body Disease. A disease that combines the mental problems of Alzheimers with the physical challenges of Parkinsons. Although he is showing the first signs, they put him into a study immediately, which is a good thing. But I'm already seeing a slight decline from where he was in September, when he was tested.

It is just over a year ago, that my Hub's oncologist, and then, in his very next appointment with his surgeon, both separately told me that I need to do something for myself. Something that is not related to either my Hubs or my Mom. .something that I enjoy to get my mind off of everything, even for an hour a day.

The easiest thing for me to do, was to take up stitching again, so I did. Last winter, every evening after dinner, I would sit and stitch, and it did help. But then those dormant creative ideas started swirling around in my brain, while I calmly drew colorful threads through fabric. But my ideas had nothing to do with sewing. And now, while I still want to finish the projects I started, my Path is taking me in new directions.

I was born into an artistic family. My Dad was a professional, and my Aunt, a stay at home Mom of the 50's, also made money with commissioned paintings. My son is an excellent artist, winning art scholarships for college, and now my older Grand daughter has followed in his footsteps. I'm so proud of them both!

And me? I can't tell you the number of times over the years that I've had to put my creative dreams on hold due to one circumstance or another. I'm not asking for sympathy or pity, it was just the way it had to be.

And, it may happen again here, but I'm fighting it every step of the way. I've gotten numerous signs that this IS the time for me to explore new avenues. I may fall flat on my face, but I picture myself creating, and I'm loving it. In fact, the only way that I can get to sleep at night, it to start creating in my imagination, and then throughout the night, I dream up all sorts of fanciful things. I'm keeping a journal of my ideas, so when the stresses of the day bore down on me, my dream world won't disappear.

This holiday season, I've had continual back problems, and my heart hasn't been in all of the things that I normally love to do. .plus I'd love to just spend the time on my art instead, but I'm doing this for my Hubby. He loves the decorations, and I'm realistically thinking about how many more he will be able to enjoy, so it is worth it to me, to do this for him.

I'm aiming for after the holidays again, like I did last year, each evening, only this time, it won't be stitching! :-)

So yeah! If anyone can figure out how to cram a few more hours into a day, without sacrificing sleep, please put me at the top of your notification list! :-)

Thank you Sarah, for providing another cleansing breath of fresh air, clearing out the mental cobwebs!

As for the quilt people's responses, I am stunned!! You were showcasing their work, there were no negative attachements to it, and it was some free publicity! It wasn't like you were trying to claim it or copy it for your own gain. How sad.

Now. .pass me a plate please. All of that shopping this afternoon has made me VERY hungry, and I love breakfast skillets for supper! :-)

holdingmoments said...

I need to get rid of the idea that going out taking pictures takes priority over everything else.

But I can't, so I'll just stay totally disorganised, and spend every spare moment with my one love; birds and nature.

That's two, I know, but you get the idea lol

Heart of a Cowgirl said...

Hi Sarah ~ Ah yes, our muse. We really do need to keep them close and listen. I'm with you, shedding some concerns (intertwined with people) that no longer feed my soul or bring me joy. Sometimes we just hold on to things for no good reason. Time to say goodbye and move on.
Stay true to yourself and happiness will come!
Take Care,

Sonia ;) said...

I am prioritizing also Dear Quacker girl...Im going thin....Love ya girlie


Lisa said...

To thine own self be true, Sarah!

stregata said...

Oh, I hear you, Sarah! I need to reorganize, set priorities and move. Wish my muse would give me a clear sign...

Barbara said...

Ah, Sarah, I hear ya...And I think you're absolutely right and also on the right path. It's hard to say no to friends, but you must be a friend to yourself, too. That's a hard lesson to learn. But things will get better this year. They have to, right? You know I'm in the next boat over from yours... ;p)Love ya and will talk to you in the next day or two. Hang in there, honey. Big hugs. xoxoBarbara

Emmy said...

I need to shed all of the excess time I just seem to waste on nothing... not playing with my kids, not cleaning, not crafting... I seem to lose so many hours of the day doing I honestly don't know what.

Miss jane said...


日月神教-向左使 said...