Monday, January 26, 2009
I've been asked to elaborate on my comment about marrying my bodyguard. I wish I could post a pic - but he would prefer I do not. I hope Ray Stevenson will not mind me using his image - as they have many similarites in looks. Huge guy, stiking blue eyes.. the part he plays in Rome so reminds me of Jim.. a force to be reconned with - but a lamb with those he loves.
So here goes...My first marriage was difficult- my ex was/is bi-polar and as the marriage wore on he became much harder to manage. Despite years of phyc., counceling and meds - little changed. I put up with physical abuse - but his mental abuse was wicked. When he started to direct it at my girls - we were done. Funny I did not value myself at the time. I had seperated from him once and gotten no help from the community or police - when I made it final - I hired a bodyguard - Jim.
My ex was frightening and was stalking me and the children. I was introduced to Jim by a mutual friend who thought he might be of help. He was a strapping 6'2", ponytail to the middle of his back, earings and combat boots. He informed me that he was a 2nd degree black belt and very capable of "dealing" with the situation. I had it from very good sources that he was trustworthy and safe for me and the girls. Despite what it may have looked like - he and I did not have a relationship at that point. He was there when the girls went for visits and when they came home - he screened phone calls and made sure that my ex was very aware of his presence. When the stalking became more serious - my lawyers and my domestic abuse councelors suggested it might be best if I moved closer to family (we were on the East coast - they on the West)or at least out of the area(all legally). Jim helped us get across the country safely & decided to stay with us.
I still chuckle over the picture of this young guy driving a huge Uhaul with a Standard Poodle in the passenger seat. I think he was unprepared for how often a gaggle of girls have to use the bathroom - lol. He got us all through tears and fears and was there for me when I had no one to turn to. What I did not know was how very young he was...22. I was 37 at the time. I had guessed he was close to 30 - uhmmmm not. Some of you will say,"OMG, craddle robber!" Some will say, "You go girl." I will say this...we have been together now for nearly 12 years - I adore the man and can safely say he feels the same about me. It hasn't always been easy - we have had some very rough years - but we stuck it out. We share two amazing children. I have felt from the very beginning - that I knew him - in a deeper way- like I had known him forever. We often joke that we better get it right this time or were gonna have to do it all over next time.
He is a contradiction in terms...he has been a bouncer for many years - yet this semester his is taking Ballet 2. Loves it!! He is brilliant, but socially uncomfortable. A badass in the first degree - but a teddy bear if ya really know him. Public speaking makes him wanna puke - but he can make me laugh until tears are rolling down my cheeks and often. He is without a doubt an amazing Father! He is not only the bodyguard - but the guardian of my heart as well!